Kept thinking should l go to bible study last nite, i was contemplating ... then Jane came and give me a "push"... unreluctantly i gave in.. the rest is history..

This song was birth forth when i was in service last nite with Songs of Solomon bible study with Pastor Kong. Never felt this way for a very long time. Just when i feel my heart is dry.. His Love came watering in. Pastor said something and i still kept in my heart. He mentioned that there will always always be a point of our lives when God calls us to decide will we love Him more despite of all these we have.

Decisions we make have an impact of our future. I kept running from Him, He kept pursuing me with His stuborn love. Who are we really that He is so mindful of? I guess it all boils down to the first love that we have for Him. I remembered my first love. It was almost like heaven on earth. The joy that flows from within is so unexplainable. Oh.. how i missed my first love... sooner or later again i know He will ask me the same question.. despite of it all .. will i still be in love with my King...

Yes i love Him, maybe not as fervent as before. But i do love Him still. Wrote a song for Him, i wanted the world to see... He is my lover of my soul after all..

Title : Linger
Wrtitten By : Christine Lee

I want to linger in
Into your your courts my King
Bring me to your chamber
I want to stay within

Take me to where You are
Draw me near to you when I'm far
Closer each day i came near

For you are always the one I love
For you are always the one I love

Chorus:

I will linger I will stay
in your presence day by day
till I am found in your embrace

This love you gave so true
No one can love me like you do
My heart my soul belongs to you

You are the fairest among all
Your love for me stands tall
When everything fades
your love remains

You have capture my heart
let nothing do us apart
This love so pure found by none other
But you

I will follow you
I will follow you

Chorus:
I will linger I will stay
in your presence day by day
till I am found in your embrace

This love you gave so true
No one can love me like you do
My heart my soul belongs to you

Just a simple song, but i with humility i wrote. I know its not the best that is ever heard, someday i will write a better one so that the world will know thru me His love for us will be heard :)

Life is a journey.. let it begin..

Today went to service with a heavy heart... dont know why.. drag my feet to church... after svc was with Jane queueing to pay a book at the attributes... then she saw her friend.. so being a polite me i walk away to hunt some books and try not to disturb their little conversation.. after a while i came back, jane told me that her friend thought that i was her cell grp leader!!!!!! hahaha... when i heard the remark... i was so humbled.. .... hahah... i tot jane should look like my leader instead!!! hahah..

Long forgotten the passion.. long forgotten the calling.. long forgotten it until it rings today.. i dont know la so many issues to deal with.. not really want to think of it. My own needs are not met how to meet others ppl needs? Just frustrated ... dont really know how long i am able to hold on? My rope is slippery... filled with grease... trying to hold on as long as i can.

I really wish to go away.. help..

平常心 - 張惠妹

街道靜得刺耳　夜被路燈染色
趁感傷醒來前　先上車　不會不捨
承認我是弱者　不敢再對愛假設
我真的累得　不想再拉扯

＊我尋找的平靜　是我將來看電影　
帶著一顆平常心　不必為誰心碎閉上眼睛
我需要的平靜　是敢回頭看曾經　
那些為愛患得患失的情景
我選擇忘記＊

我不懂得取捨　才讓心痛堆著
找得到前些年　的快樂　
只是偶爾 回憶是個誘餌　
是來叫我回去的要傷能癒合　我非走不可

Its been a year since he left.. coming to think of it is the exact day. Got contact with him still via messenger, heard that he is residing in KL now. Hope he is doing well there and i guess here it ends this chapter of my life ..

Yesterday...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7B8Op3SyPfo